Drum roll please...
I AM ENGAGED!
Germy Germ popped the question a few weeks ago. It was mellow, low key, no pomp and circumstance... I wouldn't have wanted it any different.
We were at the house, where we first started, and he was acting REALLY weird. I kept asking if he was pissed off or what was going on. Anyway, we're in my room and he pulls me to the side of the bed and he's on the floor and all the sudden he goes in SUPER SRS mode.
He told me that he loved me more than he ever imagined possible, I was the epitome of everything he wanted in a person, that he loved my kids and felt blessed to be apart of their lives, loved how I was with his girls and that as long as I was around, he felt that everything would be okay.
The ring is GORGEOUS. I helped design it, but I wasn't real sure how it would turn out. I loooooooooove it.
My mom is not speaking to me... she apparently has nothing to say to me that I would like to hear, so, yeah. I spilled my heart out to her and she's yet to respond in any tangible way.
You know, I have spent my life bending over backwards to make that woman proud of me and she has made me feel like I was an utter failure over and over again. I love that woman, but I'm ready to stop letting her dictate my opinion of myself. I am an amazing mother, I am a good person and am a very very happy individual. I may not have lots of money in the bank or some fancy title next to my name, but Jesus Christ, if you can't be proud that your kid turned out to be a happy, well adjusted person... what exactly do you need from them?
I'm learning how to be in this "step-mom" role. We're fortunate that all the kids are young, his are 7 and almost 9, so we don't have to deal with teenage hormones on top of everything. That doesn't mean that there's not an adjustment.
We're learning how to handle disciplining the kids together and how to have each other's backs. I've tried to be consistent with my discipline of the kids and I guess for the most part I do a pretty good job of it. I'm the same way with his girls that I am with my kids and when Germy's not around, they do exactly as I tell them. When he is around... different story.
Both of his girls are poster children for "Daddy's Little Girls" and I love their relationship, BUT it does make discipline a little bit of a sore point. His youngest definitely has his card when it comes to that.
It's just hard. I know how I felt whenever my dad and step mom got serious and how all my territorial instincts came out. That was MY daddy and who did this woman think she was telling me how to act? But at the same time, I also have two kids watching my relationship with his girls and I don't want anybody to think that anyone is getting preferential treatment. I don't want the girls thinking that I'm trying to take their dad away from them, but at the same time, I don't want two kids to dictate the boundaries of our relationship.
We're getting through it and talking it out... Germy Germ's not exactly thrilled whenever we talk about it because while he agrees that I have a point, he doesn't enjoy feeling like I'm mad at him or not happy with the way he's doing things.
Good Heavens! Who knew?
A's pre-K registration is on Monday. When did that happen? When did that little baby that I learned how to take care of by stumbling blindly through day-by-day become a kid that needs to be registered for formal schooling?
